When Insults had Class

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices
I admire." --Winston Churchill

"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
-- Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many
obituaries with great pleasure."- Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send
a reader to the dictionary." William Faulkner (about
Ernest Hemingway)

"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come
from big words?" Ernest Hemingway (about William
Faulkner)

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll
waste no time reading it." Moses Hadas

"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea
of any man I know." Abraham Linclon

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this
wasn't it." -- Groucho Marx

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter
saying I approved of it." -- Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his
friends." -- Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my
new play. Bring a friend... if you have one." - George
Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend
second... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in
response

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like
having you here." --Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." --
John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's
nothing trivial." -  Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of
dullness in others." -- Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
-- Paul Keating

"He had delusions of adequacy." -- Walter Kerr

"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation
won't cure." -- Jack E. Leonard

"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." --
Robert Redford

"They never open their mouths without subtracting from
the sum of human knowledge"-- Thomas Brackett Reed

"He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker
forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame
them." - James Reston (about Richard Nixon)

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always
yielded easily." --Charles, Count Talleyrand

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." --
Forrest Tucker

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without
any address on it?" -- Mark Twain

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others,
whenever they go." --Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts...
for support rather than illumination."-- Andrew Lang
(1844-1912)

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." -- Billy Wilder